Remembering Whatsername
by OpheliaMarie13
Summary: A clash between the album and the musical, including SaintWhatsername, Jesername, and SaintJesus if you squint really hard. Starting at She's a Rebel. Rated T because it's American Idiot. Cameo appearences are possible.
1. Chapter 1

**Because of the way I dress and the way I act most people think that it must be a sign of the apacolypse when they find out that I love Green Day. Not that I blame them, the most listened to artists on my iPod are Coldplay, Green Day, and Katy Perry. (In that order, and very close to a three-way tie.) If I was ever lucky enough to be in any production of American Idiot: The Musical, I would want to play Whatsername. Not just because she's a big part or because she gets to make out and have sex with J.O.S. but because she's badass, and won't let anyone tell her what to do or who to be. (And because all of my friends would probably expect me to be Heather and I would love to prove them wrong.) Because of that, I think that she should've ended up with St. Jimmy. Say whatever you want about Jimmy being a rebellious shadow of Johnny I still think Whatsy and J would've been awesome- and I'm not just saying that because Billie Joe Armstrong is the real life St. Jimmy and is a punk rock GOD. Just wanted for put that out there before you read. **

**This was how I imagined Johnny's meeting with Whatsername while listening to A.I. during the conversion from _Give Me Novocaine _to _She's a Rebel_. Plus St. Jimmy was the one who sings S.A.R. in the musical, so that worked out. **

* * *

_July 4_

It was around, maybe two in the afternoon. Hell, I've got no idea. I was high as fuck and with the shitty lighting in the bar you couldn't tell time worth a damn. Jimmy just kept laughing and then I had to puke. I barely made it into the stall before letting my breakfast (two big macs) along with a shot of tequila and hash come out. It tasted twice as bad coming up as it had going down. Then the rest that came out was watery acid tasting crap. When I got out of the bathroom, I might have been slightly less high, since I'd just up-chucked most of the shit in my system that was making me high. All I know is that I sobered up enough to see everything and have it in crystal clear memory when _she_ walked in. I didn't see her at first, but I knew that some good-looking chick must've walked in because one of the drunks walked up to her and asked,

"How much for one night?"

"Do I _look_ like a prostitute to you?" Her voice was in perfect pitch. The drunk guy started laughing like she'd said the most hilarious thing he'd heard in his life. It eventually turned to wheezing and coughing until he said,

"Yeah. You do sweetheart." He moved towards her and she backed away letting him face flat on his face, out cold.

"Where the hell's the bouncer?" She yelled.

"That's him." The bartender- the only other sober person in the bar- shouted back. A strange moaning sound came out of her mouth and she jumped over him.

"And we're back to zero." She said erasing a 14 from a chalkboard and drawing a zero in one perfect swoop. A few people clapped and she curtsied. I guessed at that point, that she was a regular here as much as Jimmy was. The bartender smacked him with a towel.

"J, you're girl's here." He said. Jimmy perked up, half sober like me. The girl came over and sat on his lap and went straight into kissing him. She was dressed in black nylons, combat boots, leather shorts, and a dark violet button down. The way she leaned on Jimmy gave a nice view of her cleavage and- once again- being high as fuck and intrigued by her- I couldn't help but stare. His hand became tangled in her wild carmel hair and he pulled out a magenta streak and stopping kissing her to stare at it.

"What happened to green?" Jimmy asked.

"I got bored. And some skank dyed her hair all green. Didn't want to cause any mixups." She responded. With a causal shrug Jimmy went back to having his tongue in her mouth. A soft moan rippled from her throat and I think I had an orgasm just by _listening_ to it. The girl sent kisses down Jimmy's neck and stayed on his collar bone for awhile.

"Oh, Johnny. Sorry. Where are my manners?" He asks remembering me. The girl removed her mouth from his chest and looked me up and down. Damn. Her eyes. I thought that it was illegal for something to be that shade of brown unless it was an M&M. "Jesus of Suburbia, this is... Whatsername. Whatsy, J.O.S."

"Charmed." She said reaching out a hand. Like an idiot, I stared are her black fingernails. Whatsername pulled her hand back. "If you're too high to realize, I'm the sex slave, lover, and girlfriend of the one, the only..." She paused kissing Jim full on the lips then pulled away staring at him with pure lust. "St. Jimmy." Then went to making out with his chest.

"Babe." He said after about a minute. She made that moaning noise again and I think we _both_ had erections. I awkwardly crossed my legs but it still hurt, pressure or no pressure. Jimmy leaned his head back for a solid five minutes while Whatsername kissed his neck. "Babe, it's not that I don't want you to stop- because believe me, I don't- I just don't think we should be rude to our new roommate." Whatsername perked up at that.

"He's moving in?" She asked.

"Just down the hall, but you know, since we're drug buddies he'll be living with us most of the time." Jimmy said. She blinked at him several times, her eyelashes looked like butterfly wings dripping with ink.

"We can still fuck whenever we want right?" I couldn't believe she said it with a straight face.

"Yeah." St. Jimmy replied. Whatsername shrugged. The two of them went back to making out, Jimmy resorted to sucking on her neck. After enough time to leave a mark he kissed her neck.

"Hey," Whatsername said. "Jim, I got you something."

"Another girl for a three-way?" He asked hopefully.

"No. Something better." She said smiling.

"Two girls for a four-way?" Jimmy asked. The drugs were going back into his blood, either that or dry-humping Whatsername must've been making him drunk. I was getting tipsy just watching them. She shook her head.

"Look." Whatsername unbuttoned her shirt then showed him a lacy black bra, showing off lovely cleavage.

"Damn!" Jimmy shouted. "I like this present." She smiled buttoning up again.

"I got it in red and white also. Matching bikinis." Whatsername leaned in and whispered in his ear, "I try them on for you tonight, maybe if you're lucky, you'll see it in nude too." Jimmy's face turned into a smile.

"I see what you're getting at." He said. She smiled and turned to me.

"You done with that?" I looked at the joint in my hand I'd forgotten about. I shrugged and handed it to her. "Thanks." She managed to hold it like a regular cigarette and took a deep drag. She blew out a circle of smoke. Then took two more long drags, and blew out three perfect rings of smoke. Whatsy handed it back to me. "There."

"No problem." I said taking it back. I took a deep breath inhaling and I tried to blow out smoke like she did, but it was impossible. I ended up coughing a gasping like an idiot. She stared at me, she must've thought I was a rookie. Then Whatsername handed Jimmy a wad of cash.

"Your turn." She said getting off of his lap. He smiled standing up and reaching into her back pocket to grab a bag of- I'm not even sure what it was- groping her ass in the process. Whatsername smiled and adjusted his red tie, pulling on it like a noose and forcing him to kiss her again. I could hear their tongues moving around and she made that moan again. Jimmy pushed into her and they kept at it for another minute or so before pulling apart. They weren't even out of breath. "Don't keep me waiting." Whatsername said as he walked away. The bartneder handed her a glass of something. She sat back down and looked at me.

"Hi." I said awkwardly. She nodded taking a sip of her drink.

"Saw you checking me out." Whatsername said making her eyes pop out of her head. "Smooth. I barely even noticed." Sarcasm dripped from her voice in a teasing manner.

"In your dreams Whatsy." I scoffed. She raised an eyebrow, chugging from her glass.

"Yeah. Sure."

"It's true." I said. Ouch, that hurt. My voice cracked for the first time since I hit puberty in sixth grade. Whatsername had a grin on her face at she looked downward. I followed her gaze down south. _Fuck._ "I can't control that. You're attractive." I defended weakly.

"And you would only know that if you checked me out." She said. "Checkmate."

"I-" Whatsername smiled and laughed. "You win. It's not my fault you're hot." I took one last puff of smoke and burnt it in the ash tray next took her bare arm. I brushed against her skin for a nanosecond.

"Nah, I'm used to it. Since I was fifteen really." She said. "So you're across the hall now?" I nodded. "Just don't sit on the blue velvet couch, Jimmy and I have our makeup sex on that."

"Any other places I should avoid?" I asked.

"The bathtub, the shower, the bedroom, the non-pot closet, the vanity, the other shower, the living room floor, sometimes we do it in the elevator to see if we can without getting caught-"

"Should I just assume you've had sex everywhere?" I cut her off.

"Not on the kitchen floor." Whatsername said. "Cold, hard tile. Wouldn't be a good idea. Oh that reminds me, the kitchen table."

"You guys just do it for fun or out of boredom?" I asked. She finished her drink before answering.

"A little of both." She said closing her eyes and tilting her head back. "Fifty shades of J, any time of day." Then a moan rippled from her throat. She must've had a boner-radar because before I could feel it her eyes snapped to my pants.

"I-" I stopped. There was no point in denying it. "It's that moaning noise you make. Gives me like-"

"An ear-gasm?" Whatsername asked. "St. Jimmy's given me a load of those while trying to sing me to sleep."

"What, he can't sing?" I asked.

"Jesus of Suburbia! Weren't you listening. I can't sleep with an ear-gasm." She said.

"What is that exactly?" I asked.

"When you get a hard-on from someone's voice." Whatsername sighed. "Or moan. Is it really that sexy?"

"You tell me." I pointed to my dick. She laughed.

"I guess I'm a sexy bitch then." Whatsy sighed. She pressed herself into me and it took all my strength not to sigh. Our hips were the same height, she pressed a littler harder and- "Damn. I guess I am sexy."

"Yeah." I said. _Idiot._ Whatsername grabbed the collar of my shirt and pressed her mouth on mine. The feeling was hot and intimate, the kiss was warm and wet. She tasted like citrus and her breath carried the scent of weed. Her hand slipped under the collar of my shirt and I grabbed her hips. Whatsername let a groan out and her lips vibrated. She pushed her pelvis against my boner and let out a whimper. It was almost sexier than the moaning. Our tongues fought for dominance, but clearly having more skill than me, Whatsername won. She arched her back and her breasts pressed into my chest. I grabbed her thigh pulling her leg up until she wrapped her legs around my torso and I groped for her ass. Whatsername grabbed for the front of my shirt and began popping the buttons off, of all the days in the world I had to pick _that_ one to wear an undershirt. Whatsername reached for the the hem of my shirt and I grabbed her wrist. We both stopped as I felt the strips of skin that were smoother and stretched tighter that than normal skin would be. She gasped out of breath and reclined.

"Jimmy gets drunk all the time." Whatsername said fixing her hair. "He hooks up with street walkers all the time. I can't control it. So he gives me permission to makeout with guys whenever I want. You seemed into me, and it's more fun when both people are at least a little bit attracted to each other." She glanced at me, then her eyes darted downward. "Bye." She speed-walked out of the bar as I tried to process what the hell just happened. I'd made out and dry humped my best friend's girlfriend after knowing her for maybe twenty minutes. But that wasn't was I was thinking.

_She said she was a little bit attracted to me._


	2. Chapter 2

**This was intented to be a oneshot, then a threeshot, and now I have no idea how long I'll end up making it. Life's funny ain't it? Short chapters suck, but this will probably be the only one.**

* * *

_July 8_

I hadn't talked to Whatsername since we made out and I felt the scars on her wrist. So she cut herself. Or used to. Either way, it wasn't really a shock. I'd seen homelesss guys sniffing glue every other day. Why not admit it, in high school I let the blade graze me too. I'd _seen_ Jimmy cut himself. I don't know. That Whatsy is a weird one.

I thought that it would be a great day. I hit the jackpot and found a guy with the purest crystal meth I'd ever seen. He was half drunk too, so I only paid like fifty bucks. I thought that Jimmy would be proud, in some kind of sick twisted version of a son doing something to impress his dad. I knocked on the door the his apartment waiting for an answer. I heard a weird grunt and opened the door. Jimmy was sprawled on the couch- the one Whatsername said they had makeup sex on- half naked. I picked up a decent looking navy shirt on the coffee table and threw it at him. Jimmy moaned.

"Hangovers. Suck." He mumbled pulling it on. His head came out of one of the sleeves. He moaned loudly then mumbled around until he got the shirt on only to realize it was on backwards, and inside-out. When Jimmy managed to finally pull it on his eyes snapped to the bag in my hand. "What's that?"

"Crystal meth." I said. "Care to lighten up your hangover?"

"Get that out of here." Jimmy said. "Whatsername's gonna freak if she sees it." His voice was serious and I was shocked at first.

"Why?" I asked. The door opened. There she stood.

"What the hell is that?" Whatsername asked.

"Meth." I said.

"Get that fucking shit out of my house before I scream." She threatened. I blinked. "I swear, I will yell rape if you don't get out of here." I ran past her quickly closing the door behind me. Even across the hall I could hear the two of them screaming at each other. I doubted they would take it the blue velvet couch.

* * *

_July 10_

Jimmy was out pushing for the day, so I had nothing to do. I wandered around for awhile. I thought about Will. How far into the pregnancy was Heather? Tunny went to war. What if he was dead? And here I was smoking something every other day and waiting to get laid. I walked down the street and towards the bar. There was a fight or something going on inside so I headed towards the fire escape. Whatsername sat with her legs dangling over the edge and I stood next to her.

"Sorry I snapped the other day." She said inhaling from her pipe. I could tell it was crack. She blew out a heart. It was lopsided but it was a friggin' _heart_. How the hell does a person do that? "My parents were meth addicts and absolute assholes."

"Oh." I said. My voice cracked again.

"Got time for a backstory?"

"Sure. Why not?" I said. Whatsername sucked on the end of her pipe and blew out again. Plain smoke this time. It curled into the air and she handed it to me.

"I moved out when I was fourteen. Either I would end up like my parents or I could wait for the cops to take somewhere." She began. "T'was a dark and stormy night. I remembered learning that meth is only good the first time you take it because you can never get back up to that high. So I found a guy. I'm not gonna lie, it was one of the best experiences of my life. But the crash was like the high and the falling all in one. I cut myself. I drank. I slept in a cardboard box for three days and then hid in a closet. It was two weeks of living in a black-and-white hell. Then I spent about a year bouncing around. Tried out different drugs till I learned I'm an LSD person, for me, it's all about the trip. And because of my parents and alcoholic grandfather, I'm almost immune to most other drugs and alcohol. It's in my genetics I guess. Then, things got low at one point. I couldn't find anyone to take me in for free and I was begining to look older so people stopped treating me like a kid. One night a guy raped me in an alley. I don't really remember it because I was drunk and depressed, so don't pity me. I woke up somehwere I'd never been. I was living in a house with four other guys and a group of girls who moved in and out. This one guy Mike, was real sweet on me. We fucked around a lot but he did it with the other girls too. It made me upset because the other guys would've given up drugs for a week to makeout with me. Mike was eighteen though, and he took me in so I stayed with him and told myself I was in love. One night I got mad at him for bringing a hooker home. We yelled a lot until he said he wished James'd never brought me to him. James was a quiet guy, one of Mike's teenage pushers. Hot as fuck and still had his V-card. Pretty impressive considering the number of girls and guys in that house that wanted him. I knew he'd liked me since the day I got there and I liked him, but stayed away because of Mike." I stared at her for a moment.

"And?" I asked.

"It was Jimmy. Seventeen year old Jimmy had brought me to the guy he was living with and begged him to let me stay. I dumped Mike's ass and hopped on Jimmy's dick. By the time he was twenty and I was eighteen we got out own place and started pushing by ourselves. That's my story. You?"

"Living with my mom and her asshole husband Brad." I said proudly taking a drag. I blew out.

"Ugh." Whatsername said. "Braaaad. The sterotype name for the sterotype life-ruining step father."

"Basically." I said. "Me and my friends were going to come here together. We lived in Jingletown, tiny place saturated with TV. I didn't want to be an american idiot, I beg to dream and differ from the hollow lies. So we decided to come here. My friend Will's girlfriend Heather was pregnant so he had to stay behind. Then Tunny enlisted in the army. I'm the only one who actually made it. But what can I say? The only road I've ever walked is a lonely one. I walk an empty street; the Boulevard of Broken Dreams."

"Where the city sleeps and I'm the only one and I walk alone." Whatsername sang softly. I looked at her. "I walk alone, I walk alone."

"I walk alone, I walk a-"

"You were the guy singing outside my window!" She said. "That is so weird..."

"Yeah. You've got a nice voice." I said.

"You too Jesus." Whatsername said.

"It's Johnny." I said. "My real name. I made up J.O.S."

"Oh." She said. "Like how Jimmy calls himself _Saint_ Jimmy?"

"Yeah. Why does he call himself that?" I asked.

"Like I said earlier, he stayed pure for a long time. Until he was twenty." Whatsername said inhaling from her pipe again. Two circles.

"Damn." I said. She nodded. "So what's your real name?"

"Amanda." She said. "When I was new in town everyone referred to me as 'that girl', Jimmy started calling me Whatsername and it stuck."

"Umm about that thing that happened the other day..." I began.

"What?" Whatsername asked. I scooted closer to her and pressed my thigh against hers. "Oh. That. Jimmy and I seem serious, but we're rocky at best. I mean- yes it makes for great fuck time and all- but we're not steady. We were much closer before we moved here. I miss the days when we slept on a pile of sheets in a crappy apartment, I'm not getting them back. We've started growing apart, I want to stop it but I can't. It's the drugs." She started crying. "He's almost been to rehab twice now. He cuts all the time and pushes more than he used to. I mostly do LSD, but he does everything. I'm going to lose him. But I've accepted it and I'm just waiting for the day when he calls it quits."

"It's okay." I said putting one arm around her. Whatsername put her head on my shoulder. Tears fell down her face without either of us making a noise. "It's okay." And in that moment- despite the fist fight downstairs, the pusher down the block, and all the other troubles going on- it might have been okay for just one moment.


	3. Chapter 3

**Double update because this has only gotten nine veiws so far. That's right. NINE fucking VEIWS. *tune of ****"¡Viva La Gloria**!* Idiot Nation! Where are you Idiot Nation? I know you're out there because this archive has 280 fics. This is SaintWhatsername so where are all those shippers? I'm trying to find you in the jilted crowd.

**Meh, I suppose asking for reveiws is useless. Just enjoy the chapter.**

* * *

_July 12_

"Johnny, my friend." Jimmy said opening the door to my apartment.

"Yeah?" I asked looking away from the T.V.

"Whatsy and I are going out. You want in?" He asked. "In the honor of our past stoner generations, it's a pill party."

"Well..." I said turning back to the T.V. "I was gonna catch up on my Bachelor, but sure." I got off the couch and walked across the hall to Jimmy's apartment.

"Mandy, ready yet?" He called.

"Yeah." She hollered. Whatsername came out dressed in a black speghetti strap dress, ripped leggings, knee-high boots, and a black ribbon was tied around her neck. Her hair was obviously flat-ironed. The whole look was what you'd expect to see as a picture definition for sexy.

"Let's go." Whatsername said taking Jimmy's hand. He looked at me.

"Yeah." I said feebly. Jimmy smiled.

"Get us a cab." He told Whatsername. She breezed past me smiling. As soon as she was gone Jimmy started talking.

"Hands off as long as you're sober." He said. "After you get high, or drunk, I don't care."

When we got to the place- it was an old warehouse- Whatsername grabbed a can of soda and a cup with clear liquid at the bottom.

"Wanna join me on the other side?" She asked pouring soda into the cup.

"What's that?" I asked.

"LSD cocktail." Whatsername said simply. I shook my head.

"I'm going to bounce around." I said. She nodded.

"One of the guys is brining a fleece carpet, it's fucking awesome to dance on when you're high." Whatsername said. "If we get lucky, I'll see you tomorrow when we're both hungover." She saluted and began chugging her coke. I wandered up the stairs and found Jimmy smoking grass with some other guys.

"Hey, guys this is my friend." He said. Already high. Only Jimmy. "Johnny, Johnny, don't tell Whatsername I'm cheating in her."

"What?" I asked before stopping myself. Jimmy laughed.

"With Mary-Jane!" He said staring at his joint. "I love weed." On if the guys rolled one up for me and lit it. I took a drag. Jimmy smiled at me.

"What?" I asked.

"You're very sexy." He said. Without any time for me to realize, Jimmy kissed me. For a long time. Everyone else was either too high or too busy to notice. "Shit. Whatsy's bit gonna like that." Jimmy said pulling his mouth off of mine. I walked out of that situation as quickly as possible. I took long drags from my joint and stood against a wall watching a bunch of LSD junkies dance around on the carpet Whatsername was talking about. I picked her out and watched her dance. I'm not sure if it was the pot or beer (At that point I think I'd had one.) but she looked so goddamn perfect. She stood on her tiptoes waltzing around with her arms spread out. She was wearing makeup too. Eyeliner and red lipstick. I hadn't noticed earlier. Whatsername smiled at me and pulled me in to dance with her. She stayed close to me and kept giggling and fluttering her eyelashes. The drugs both sharpened and dulled my senses. The rest of the party faded out and I focused on Whatsername. The black dress was cut high up on her thigh and it clung to her skin like the fabric was melted to her body. At one point we stopped dancing apart and she put her arms around my neck. Second by second the space between us was closed off. Then we started making out. I started the kiss that time. I took Whatsername by surprise and she liked it. This time I had the advantage, being less high than her. I took the lead, giving her kiss after kiss to the point where I could barely breathe. But I needed her, I needed Whatsername. She moaned and I had an ear-gasm and a boner all in one. Hard as it was, I ignored both and used her open mouth as an opportunity to slide my tongue in. It only got better from there. Whatsername sobered up enough to fight back and push her mouth into mine harder. We continued for what might have actuvally been an hour. She was the one to stop the kiss.

"I'm gonna crash soon." She said out of breath. "Can you take me home? J-Jimmy"ll be fine."

"Yeah." I said. Whether she was making all of this up or not, I didn't know. All I cared was that I had a ten minute ride alone with her. Whatsername stumbled outside and we walked to a bus stop. We sat down on the least diseased-looking seat and she looked down at her feet.

"Shit. I forgot my shoes. Shit, shit, shit, shit. Fucking shit." Whatsername said. No one on the bus seemed to notice that she was high, I was somewhat drunk, and that she was using rather colorful language. Then again, the only other people on the bus were two thirteen year-olds sucking off each others' faces and a homeless guy. Or girl. It was impossible to tell. Whatsername leaned her head on my shoulder and I perked up (in more then one place). I uncomfortably crossed my legs and the cheap plastic seat made a weird noise.

"Johnny?" Whatsername asked. She pointed at the teenagers. "What arrre they doingg?"

"Making out." I said. "Are you that high? I thought you just had that LSD cocktail."

"Someone was snortingg something and I wanted in. Either that or I had a beer. Can't rememerrr." Her speech was slurred.

"I'm guessing it was a beer." I said.

"So what'dd you do thewholenigh?" Whatsername asked.

"Pot, beer, got kissed by your boyfriend, then I danced with you. We made out too." I answered.

"I wouldn't forrgett that lasss part. Not in a million years." Whatsername said. "Jimmy kissed you? Not thatt surprising. "

"It was weird." I said. "Is he bisexual?"

"Yeah." She said. Whatsername stared into space. I followed her gaze and it was the kids making out. "Are you sure they're just kissing?" As if on cue the girl moved on top of the guy so they laid on the plastic seats.

"Yeah." I said.

"Well, whatevverr it is, I think blondie's winning." She pointed to the girl. Her lacy shirt gave a sneak at her pale skin, her black skinny jeans looked like they were painted on her legs, she wore gray converse and her eyes were smudged with brown eyeliner. The guy was slightly paler than she was, his messy brown hair fell over his eyes and he wore converse, jeans, and a Metallica shirt. Whatsername watched them like they were a movie. The two of them stopped kissing and sat up.

"Hey." The girl said fixing her hair.

"Hi ." Whatsername said.

"You high?" The guy asked looking at her.

"LSD." Whatsername said. "He's drunk."

"Cool." The girl said. She went back to kissing her boyfriend. Her arms wrapped around his neck and he tangled his hand in her hair, the other one slipped under her collar. The boy planted a sloppy kiss on her ear, then stared into her teal eyes.

"I love you." He whispered.

"I love you too." She sighed resting her head on his chest. He nodded towards the window and picked up a guitar case. She held out a leather jacket for him, instead he placed it on her shoulders fastening the top button. Her pale pink lips curved into a smile. The bus came to a stop and they got off holding hands.

"Even if they aren't really in love, it's stilll swweet." Whatsername said. She placed her head in my lap and put her feet up. She slept until we got to our stop. I carried her up to the apartment.

And when I woke up the next morning I was lying next to Whatsername.


	4. Chapter 4

**FTW. Triple update. This is the shortest, crappiest, shortest chapter I've ever written in my life. But I'm not in the mood to write a lemon, and I'm depressed. My life is really sucking right now, so I have an excuse. The next chapter will either be good, or the last crappy one. Depends. Enjoy. **

* * *

_July 15_

I stared at the ceiling. Then I looked at her again. No way can this be happening. I thought. There is no way, I brought her home, then- Shit, I couldn't remember. I laid her down on the bed, and I left. Right? But this is _my_ room. As in, we're in _my_ apartment. Maybe I did bring her home. I was drunk, she was high, and watching those two kids on the bus make out made me want some of my own. And Whatsername was the one I wanted. Since I'd fist met her, I'd wanted her. She's a rebel. I'd needed her, maybe I went to extreme measures. I peeked under the sheets. My eyes went huge and I stared at the ceiling again. I sat up. Then I glanced around and saw the little black dress she'd worn last night strewn on the ugly shag carpet. Next to the red flannel shirt I'd worn. Only a few inches away from it was the black lacy bra she'd displayed to Jimmy- shit, shit, _shit_. I looked at her again. Perfection. Her hair was messy again and I played with the magenta streak. Whatsername opened her eyes.

"Morning." She sighed. One second later reality hit her. "Johnny, what the hell?! Where- how... did you drug me?" Her pupils were three times as big as they should've been. It made her look hot, crazed, and high all at once.

"No! I did not drug you! I wouldn't drug you when you were high! I was drunk last night. Do you remember anything?" I asked. Whatsername knitted her eyebrows together.

"I remember dancing with you. Making out with you. Then we walked to a bus stop and my feet hurt. I think I left my shoes at the warehouse-"

"You did." I interrupted.

"Damn. I was high." She said. "Ummmm, we got on a bus...? Then there was a homeless... Person. And for some reason I was watching these two teenagers have sex."

"They were making out." I almost moaned.

"That was not making out!" Whatsername shouted. "Whatever it was the girl was winning."

"You said that last night." I said. She gave me a death glare. "Sorry."

"They just looked so perfect. He was tall, she was medium, he had a wide frame, she was lean- well she had a frame too, but it was smaller than his of course- and he was just so sweet to her... Then I fell asleep in your lap and you carried me into my apartment. And- then what happened?"

"I don't know. That's why I'm asking you." I said. She sat up.

"Oh my God!" Whatsername shouted pulling the sheets up to cover her bare chest. I didn't even notice.

"Dammit." I mumbled. She looked appalled. "Sorry! You're hot, naked, and in my bed! That is the general reaction when you cover yourself up."

"So we did it then?" Whatsername asked.

"If by 'it' you mean hot drunken sex, yes." I said.

"How do you know it was hot?" She asked.

"I've made out with you. If that was hot, I know our sex must've been great." I stated.

"Shit what am I going to tell Jimmy?" She said.

"Hellooooo." A voice called opening the door. Jimmy smirked at us.

"Were you listening that whole time?" I half-shouted. Whatsername slid under the covers.

"Yes." Jimmy said smiling. " I knew you liked her, I set this up. Whatsy wanted this too. And aren't you two adorable together?"

"You did this?" I asked. Jimmy nodded.

"Now then, I've got another hangover to deal with." He said leaving. Whatsername came out from under the sheets.

"You like me?" I asked.

"You have the willpower to not drink, you understand me, and have a great ass. How did you not see that coming?"

"Amanda," I felt the need to call her by her real name. "This may come as a shock to you, but I haven't had much experience with girls. And you're not the easiest book to read."

"I don't like open books." She said coming closer to me. "I like long chapter books with complicated plots that keep you in the edge of your seat. And when you think you've figured out one thing, something else happens. I want a book that will keep me reading."

"That sucks, because I'm the most open book out there." I said.

"But you can still read me." She said. I smiled.

"Chapter one, sex." I said. Whatsername nodded.


	5. Chapter 5

**This chapter is going into detail on Whatsername and Johnny's love life because most of that was done in tiny Johnny-monoluges during the musical, so this is a collaberation on the album and musical, as most of this fic is. Please reveiw, since I'm still on my hunger strike for the ones who won't make it for dinner, I'm _literally_ living off of them.**

* * *

_July 22_

Sex, drugs, and sex took up most of my time with Whatsername. The weirdest part was the Jimmy wasn't bothered at all. It was a little creepy. Whenever I asked him about it, he jut said it gave him more time to push and be didn't have to worry about Whatsername getting on his case for coming home half-naked and drunk at four AM in the morning. It was nice not having to go into a job every day. All I had to do was carry pot in my pockets and sell when people wanted me to. Whatsername tended to have one hour where she would sell to teenagers, only because it was a mild version of pot that was usually mixed in with oregano. It was kind of sweet and strange at the same time. She was looking out for them by giving it to them, but she was stealing their money to sell them a bag half-filled with pizza seasoning. Whatever way you looked at it, any teen in town who was doing pot, was only getting half as high and doing half the damage to themselves.

"Hey." Whatsername said coming in through the window off the fire escape. "Let's go for a drive." I laughed.

"We don't have a car." She shrugged.

"But we have enough money to ride the bus." We walked out the door holding hands.

Neither of us were high or drunk, or impaired in any way at the moment so it was nice to enjoy. We spent our time on the lovely first class maggot-covered bus staring at our fellow passengers.

"Denim. Everywhere." I said pointing at a balding guy who was too busy making out with a Big Mac to notice that I was pointing at him. He wore a pair of faded blue jeans and a jean jacket buttoned up completely. Whatsy laughed. She pointed at a girl with a frizzy up hairdo and a checkered shirt paired with baggy jeans. Her black coffee eyes darted around and her thin lips were pulled into a tight smirk.

"Poser." She whispered. I took my turn.

" 'I want to kill myself.' " I said pointing to our zombie bus driver. Whatsername scoffed. Her head rested on my shoulder. A teenage girl got on the bus. My mind began reeling to figure out how I could categorize her. The girl had flat-ironed blonde hair and teal eyes. She wore a red tucked in Foo Fighters T-shirt, a plaid black skirt with safety pins holding the torn edges together, and ankle high combat boots. Her face was fresh, pale, and pure- except for the thick black eyeliner and eyeshadow making her eyes pop. Punk. I thought. Definitely. She walked over to one of the poles and hung on it, swinging around as if we were on a playgroud acting like children instead of on a bus driving at thirty-five miles an hour. Even if it was weird, she still did it. That said something about her.

"Punk." I said as the girl sat down a few sweats away from us. Her head snapped up when I said that. She smiled pushing back hair behind one ear. My eyes flickered to her wrist. There was a tiny tattoo. In flowing cursive it read: for hope.

"Nice tat." Whatsername said.

"I need to get it removed. It's supposed to say FIGHT FOR HOPE. My ex has the other part." The girl said shyly.

"Hey! I know you!" Whatsername almost shouted. "I met you when I was high."

"Yeah." The girl said. "I'm taking a bus home, then I leave this place, hopefully for good."

"Why?" I asked. She ran her fingers though her hair.

"My ex is a bastard and I need to get away from him." She said. "Dumping his ass his the best choice I've made this year.

"So why'd you breakup with him, if you don't mind me asking? The two of you seemed so perfect." Whatsy said.

"He was great." She sighed. "Great kisser, understood me, liked my music, sang to me over the phone, gave me great advice, knew how to make me laugh. He gave me my space and also, really nice hugs. Have you ever met a person who can give good hugs?"

"A few." Whatsername said.

"Sometimes, it was better than kissing. I could just pour out my heart and cry while he hugged me." She said.

"So if he was so perfect why'd you leave him? Or did he leave you?" I asked. Whatsername choked on her laughter.

"This girl has a great personality and likes good music. The guy couldn't have left her if he was gay." She paused. "Was he gay?" The girl laughed.

"No." She took a deep breath. "We were in this group of kids, and- they hated me. The girls really liked- _him_, so I tried to fit in; for the first time in my life I tried fitting in. For _him_ because I loved him so much. I still do, but he's a bastard. The others made fun of me and... he led them in mocking me. I can't go start high school like this, I'm sick of this place anyways. I'm leaving. I'm just a fuck-up. The first time I really fell for a guy who I thought liked me turned out to be a Class-A jackass. And now, I can't even say his name... he stole my first kiss and I ran out of cigarettes and-" She broke off, choking back tears. "Goddamnit, I hate R.H.S."

"What?" I asked. The girl couldn't even say his name. She really did love him.

"Restless Heart Syndrome. Very common in kids my age. Anyone really." The girl said."I just need to go home. I'm changing schools and I won't have to deal with him or his infernos ever again." The bus came to a stop. Whatsername grabbed my hand and tugged. I guess we'd gone all around town.

"It was nice seeing you again." I said. The girl nodded. It felt weird just leaving her after all that.

"Thanks for listening to me." She said. Whatsername and I left. We didn't say anything even when we got back to the apartment.

"We still don't know her name do we?" She asked. I shook my head.

"Oh well, now we have another Whatsername." I joked.

"How will you tell us apart?" She asked.

"Well, there is one thing..." I said. Whatsername raised an eyebrow and smiled. "_I_ love you." She responded with a kiss.

And that was the last time I ever got to say it to her.


	6. Chapter 6

**I know this is a SaintWhatsername fic, but more of that will happen later. Don't forget about Jesername people. This will follow the course of the musical with the dates and idea from the album, because both of them are awesome. I suck at writing out the singing so if you skip over any of the song lyrics, I won't silently wish you dead. :)**

* * *

_August 2_

I begun hanging out with Jimmy more, now that I saw my relationship with Whatsername was flexible. I experimented with drugs and was doing everything at once. Heroin became my new best friend. Only second to St. Jimmy himself. I used drugs as relief to anything I was angry about. Sex with Whatsername was my outlet. It became a constant pattern; problem, smoke, sex, problem, shoot, shag, problem, needle in my arm, fuck. Bruises showed up on the girl I loved. We became distant. But we both felt the same way. Why should lack of communication change anything? Jimmy said we were slipping into the Friends with Benefits Zone. I didn't want to be just friends with Whatsername, or even friends with benefits. I thought about what the girl on the bus said, Restless Heart Syndrome. Fuck yeah.

If I had to pinpoint a day when things started downhill, I would say it was when I brought meth home.

* * *

_August 4_

I didn't want Whatsy to find out, I knew she'd freak. I didn't tell her and I planned on hiding it. But having a sixth sense, she found out.

"Goddammit! You know how I feel about that shit!" Whatsername screamed at me. "I saw that stupid drug tear my life apart, life expectancy for a meth addict is five years. Did you know that Johnny?"

"No. I didn't." I spat. "You tried it once. You said it was, 'one of the best experiences of your life'. Why can't I try it?"

"Because I love you and I don't want you to have to go through the crash." She said, tears fell down her face and clumps of eyeliner became perfectly smudged. It made her look both beautiful, and broken.

"I think I can handle it." I scoffed.

"No you can't!" Whatsername said. "I almost killed myself. I slept in a closet for two days straight and didn't eat. And I'm the one with the magic genes."

"We'll excuse me miss perfect." I snorted. "I should be able to do whatever the hell I want."

"Then do it you bastard!" She screamed. "It'll make me feel so happy to say I told you so."

"No, now I'm not going to do it." I yelled. "If you're going to be a bitch about it then what's the point?"

"Don't let me stop you." Whatsername said. "Because my opinion means nothing to you. Even though you're the one who's new in town and didn't even own a crack pipe until a few weeks ago."

"Why do you care?!" I screamed. "It's just meth!"

"No it's not! It's not just meth! It's you defying me and saying that my emotions don't matter! At least Jimmy knew-"

"Of course! Because you just had to bring your ex into this Amanda, didn't you?"

"If you would stop being an arrogant dick for one second and let me talk then maybe I could explain."

"Explain what? That you'd rather be with him over me?"

"I never said that Johnny."

"Well you're very good at playing the 'I'll say something and you figure it out from there' game." I said. Whatsername walked to the door. "Don't you dare walk out on me you-"

"Call me a bitch one more time and I will dump your ass." She cut me off.

"I thought my ass was why you liked me." I shot back.

"There are other asses out there and nine out of ten would fuck me if they had the chance."

"Fine." I said. Lamest comeback ever.

"Do your meth. See what happens." Whatsername said. She turned the doorknob. "Like I said earlier, if you would stop being a jackass for one minute maybe I could talk to you."

"If you weren't such a fucking cunt maybe I would listen." I knew that it was wrong to say. Whatsername didn't turn around, she opened the door and walked out.

* * *

_August 17_

I wrote her a song she never got to hear. Whatsername was sleeping, but I played it for her. Maybe it was my way of apologizing. It maybe I did it out of self pity. Jimmy didn't like it. He didn't like that I was trying to be, good, for her.

"Do you know the enemy?" He asked. I didn't know what he meant.

"Violence is an energy. Against the enemy!" Jimmy shouted. I shook my head. I didn't want to wake Whatsername.

"This is how I'm supposed to be." I whispered. "In a land of make-believe, that don't believe in me."

"The insurgency will rise." Jimmy said. "When the blood's been sacrificed. Don't be blinded by the lies in your eyes." He pointed to Whatsername. In that moment, I suddenly understood. I didn't need her. She was trying to tame me, wasn't the the reason I left Jingletown? To stop being tamed, to be free? St. Jimmy was everything I'd ever wanted to be. I grabbed a knife and pointed it at Whatsername. She woke with a start.

"Do you know the enemy? Do you know your enemy?" I shouted. Then she started crying. It made me crumble. I fell to my knees on the mattress. Jimmy backed away, thinking he'd won. Whatsername touched my shoulder gently. She took soft quivering breaths as she spoke.

"Do you know what's worth fighting for, when it's not worth dying for?" Whatsername whispered. "One, 21 guns. Lay down your arms, give up the fight. One, 21 guns. Throw up your arms, into the sky." She laid next to me. "You and I."

"I don't-" I began.

"Johnny, don't." She said. "You're better than this. You're hurting. I don't want you to hurt anymore."


	7. Chapter 7

**_TIME FOR THE LETTERBOMB! _And it's in Whatsername's POV because I got really bored. ENJOY BITCHES!**

* * *

_August 18_

I didn't even plan on packing, I just had to get out. Then I thought about everything that I owned and the fact that it was split between Jimmy's and Johnny's apartements. _Great._ I thought to myself. I found an old gym bag, probably from when I ran there with Jimmy, and began picking up anything that looked like it was mine and throwing it inside. Clothing, shoes, makeup, hairbrush. After I'd cleaned out Johnny's place of my things I went across the hall to Jimmy's. I almost took the red flannel shirt that smelled like Johnny with me, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. I rummaged through Jimmy's dresser and found some of my things. I even took the bag of heroin stuffed inside the easiest place, his sock drawer. I needed "girl things" and I invaded the bathroom connected to the bedroom. When I walked in I saw a picture of me taped to the mirror. I looked away, Jimmy still kept it there. I looked under the sink and grabbed several tampons before zipping up my bag. I heard a the door opening and closing. I hoped Jimmy was drunk enough to go into the bedroom and pass out. But I had no such luck. He stumbled into the bathroom closing the door behind him. I looked into his green eyes, they were hazy, he'd been drinking. It only meant that he wouldn't remember this. Jimmy walked closer to me and I slowly walked back, shrinking down and sitting on the floor. He looked in the mirror at his drunken reflection. Jimmy looked back to me.

"I thought that you were so- powerful." He said. Not quite slurred speech, he'd probably only had half his usual amount. "But here you are, sitting on the ground like a child, hoping that big bad Jimmy won't hurt you. Once upon a time, you wouldn't be here. Because you wouldn't have fallen in love with the Jesus of Suburbia. You were my girl. Oh how I miss those days Whatsy."

"I miss them too." I said quietly. I looked at his knees, because they were in my range of view and I couldn't look at his face.

"That's a load of shit and you know it." He said pulling his shirt off and throwing it in my face. Jimmy grabbed one of the counter and pulled it over his head. The one he threw at me smelled like vodka, blood, and Jimmy. But mostly, Jimmy. I held it close to my chest. "You were sick of me, bringing back hookers and doing more shit than usual. Just because I stopped being a shy virgin doesn't mean I stopped loving you. Not even the strongest Yellow Sunshine could do that to me."

"I-" I began. Jimmy crouched down and stared at me.

"Don't say a goddamn thing." He said. "You were happy to get rid of me and now that your boyfriend got rid of you, you're leaving him. You fucking _hypocrite_." I began to cry. "Don't you dare cry, don't you dare fucking cry Amanda."

"Why not?" I asked. "I have the right to cry." Jimmy stood up and looked down at me smirking to himself.

"Look at you. You thought you were going to go places. You thought you'd live a happy life with your lover. Where are you now?" Jimmy asked. "All dressed up, all fucked up with nowhere to go. Nobody likes you Whatsername. He's not even going to remember your name because of the the nickname I gave you." I stopped crying and Jimmy stood there. I got off the floor and looked him in the eye.

"You call yourself a saint and you're really a sinner. You were so perfect and now you can barely think straight. I thought I loved you-" I whispered. "And I was right. You're too drunk to remember this anyways. Maybe this is a dream." I said leaning in.

"Don't do it Amanda." Jimmy said. He said it like he was sober. I pressed my lips against his softly. They were cold as marble. It was a plain and simple kiss. No tongue, no kissing back, the basic mouth pressed against mouth that rarely happened anymore. I was crying. It was the last time I'd kiss him. I hoped. Jimmy said nothing. He did nothing. He stood there, probably not understanding anything. I could feel the tears clinging to my eyelashes. They became tangled in Jimmy's and it felt like we were both crying. Maybe we were. Warm water slid down my cheeks and I opened my eyes for a moment to see Jimmy's dark eyebrows tugged together just slightly. Whether it was in confusion or focus, I didn't know. I pulled away from him, I grabbed his wrists and looked down.

"It's better this way." I said. "This is how I want you to remember me. A kiss in a hazy dream." I watched as my tears fell down, hitting the hexagonal tiles. "I love you."

Then I grabbed my bag, and left. It wasn't until later on that I realized I was still holding his shirt in my hand.


	8. Chapter 8

**It's been too long, I know. But I had trouble writing this. I'm finally happy with it, so here you go. Sorry for its shortness. **

* * *

_January 1_

Dear Whatsername,

I dream about you. All the time. Every day and every night. I can never stop thinking about you. I wonder if you dream about me. I wonder if you remember me. I'm forgetting you though. And maybe that's a good thing. Because we can't live in the past. If we did, my friend Tunny wouldn't be alive and Will would kill someone every time Heather and her famous boyfriend come on T.V. I'll never forget the time though. I miss it. I miss the way you looked in that black dress, I miss the way you smoked, I even miss your hair. But I don't think I love you anymore. No, a part of me loves you, but I'm not IN LOVE with you. Anymore. I hope you're happy, I really do. I hope you met someone who loves you as much as I did, more than I did. Whether it's Whatshisface, or the bartender, I hope he loves you. I hope you're over Jimmy too. Because I remember how much you loved him. I think he was better for you. Even if I loved you more. But the St. Jimmy is dead. He committed suicide almost three years ago. He died because you left. Without you, he can't live. There must be light, in order for there to be dark. I don't know why I'm writing this letter. I'm pissed off that my life isn't anything. You were right, I am full of shit. Even if I am cute. No matter where you are, who you are, or when you get this, I hope things work out. Maybe I'll see you somewhere. Love is a strange thing. It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right. I hope you had the time of your life.

Sincerely,

Johnny- the Jesus of Suburbia


	9. Chapter 9

This isn't another chapter, but an alert to let you know that I will be writing a semi-prequel for 21st Century Breakdown (with that title) and a separate prequel with more SaintWhatsername. The first chapter for 21CB is already up, so you can go and read that if you wish. Thank-you so much for sticking with this fic throughout, I loved your reviews and I hope you'll read my other ones. See you in the Murder City!


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